An Honest Look at You – working through changes (pt 2)

Welcome back. Have you read pt 1 of this post? If you haven’t pause and click An Honest Look at You… Pt 1 before you continue. It’s also worth completing the exercise.

A look at your self-reflection exercise

Africanfinestmums - An Honest Look at You - working through changes. Blog post, practical advice

Look at everything you have written. Do you see any correlations between who you were and who you are now? How “lost” are you really? Is it a matter of prioritizing better to make sure you are just as important as the other members of your home?

When I did this activity a while ago, I found that what I used to love and was passionate about was art, music, and dancing. I felt like that was gone from my life. Then, I realized after looking at what I do now as a stay at home mum that I have opportunities to color and draw with my girls. I can introduce them to “new” music I used to listen to. If I want, I can actually dance with them anytime, (though I will say my moves have changed after two kids). I actually can do things that I am passionate about but thought were gone from my life. A few times, I have even brought out canvases, paint, and paint brushes and let my oldest daughter paint her own piece of art while I created something that made me happy.

Have you really changed?

Africanfinestmums - An Honest Look at You - working through changes. Blog post, practical advice

As a wife and mum, we tell ourselves that we have changed…that we are gone, but I believe that we are still there. We need to prioritize ourselves into our family life in a way that fits with ours and our family’s values. We can incorporate our passions and motivations creatively in our lives so that we feel like us again…like that feeling you get when that song comes on the radio that transports you back to who you were ages ago. You are not gone; you just need more attention than you may have been giving yourself.

Add “you” time to the schedule

Africanfinestmums - An Honest Look at You - working through changes. Blog post, practical advice

Now, after completing the exercise and finding ways to be you again that are positive and uplifting, schedule them! Put them in your calendar. You may laugh at this and say “I am not scheduling dancing!” If you don’t, will you remember to? It’s as simple as having an alarm every day that reminds you to do something in that moment that feels like you and makes you happy. Start to make it a habit and more importantly teach your kids that you matter too, and respect yourself enough to do things that bring you joy as well. You are worth it and the only way to truly lose yourself is if you let it happen. Take back control of who you are. It’s one of the best ways to be a role model for your kids and other mums!

This fabulous guest post was written by a finest mum, Katie Rössler. Katie is a licensed professional counselor from the United States living in Germany. She is the creator of the From Stay at Home Mom to Chief Household Officer program (From SAHM to CHO) which teaches and empowers mothers who stay at home full or part-time to run their households like entrepreneurs do a business. Her next program starts on June 16th. If you’re interested head over to her website (see link above) to sign up now!! Follow her on Instagram and Facebook @FromSAHMtoCHO.

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