This life is full of a lot of craziness. So to be happy and save yourself from all that craziness, just be you.
I could literally end the blog post right there. After all that is essentially the summary of what I want to say. But that would be a bit boring, so let me add a little flesh, to the bones of that statement.
Happy ever after
We know there is no such thing as happy ever after on this earth, because if there was, no rich man or woman would commit suicide, no beautiful woman would be cheated on, no hardworking individual would be struggling to be able to provide for his/her family, and King Solomon would have been the happiest man alive.
Instead, a rollercoaster full of ups and downs is what we experience in reality. That won’t change. How well we ride it, is what makes the difference, and is the bit we are able to change. We are all born, each individual, each with unique DNA. Even if you’re a twin, triplet, quad, etc. Even for the closest of these, there is at least one difference that separates each from another. Where am I going with this? I’m simply reminding us that from the moment each one of us was conceived, we were created and destined to be unique. You be you, and I’ll be me.
What the heck happened?
Somewhere along the line, some of us fall “ill” and forget who we are. I think this disease is particularly prevalent in mums. Man do we get a big, nasty dose of this. Being you gets replaced….. No actually, that’s not quite the right word. Taken over seems more appropriate. Taken over in being work colleague, wife/partner, mummy (which is code for over 10 other jobs and titles). Don’t get me wrong there are elements of you within all of these titles, and none of those titles in themselves are wrong. I am a mum, and very proud to be one. It has helped shape who I am today. However the You that takes time to explore, develop or pursue those passions that make you come alive, is she still there? The You that takes time to indulge in, or just be comfortable with sitting in those quirky behaviours or likes and interests that make you uniquely you, where is she? Has she been shelved, with the popular excuse of “there’s no time”, or “it doesn’t matter”, or “that was a long time ago”? No, just because you try to shove something under the carpet, it doesn’t mean it’s no longer there. It’s just hidden out of open view.
No. 1 tip
It’s not physical wealth, it’s not fame that will give you happiness. Many of you I’m sure know and admire someone who’s in their 70s, 80s, 90s, who does whatever they want, says whatever they feel like, and don’t give a damn what anyone else thinks. True some of them are somewhat crazy, but you’ll have to admit there’s something there that we can learn from. It seems that they’ve finally reconciled with who they are, and are living in their truth, warts and all. Doing that has set them free, made their weight lighter. They are happier. It’s like they’ve found a way or discovered, that they can be freed from societal and outwardly perceived limitations, some of which are actually made up.
In no way do I prescribe doing whatever you want regardless of how it might negatively affect others because that’s just being selfish. Being who you truly are shouldn’t cause real harm to others. But it does give you licence to be who God really created you to be, and enjoy being that, instead of a photocopy or even carbon copy of anyone else. That peace from being at one with you, and being free in you, gives a strength that helps you to grow in confidence, so that you can persevere to face, withstand and overcome the rollercoasters you will undoubtedly face in your life’s journey. It gives you happiness.
Being you means learning to love you, learning to accept you, learning to be kind to yourself. It is also learning to work on yourself so that your strengths are strengthened, and your weaknesses better managed to still turn out as positives for you. Many only discover this in their latter years. Why? This shouldn’t be the reserve of the elderly or the rich or famous. It’s a right everyone has.
I love 80s music, celebrating with others, a particularly very old pair of jeans and I love everything to do with the Olympics. Some might not care at all about these things, and that’s okay. Being me, means I am free to, and allow myself to enjoy these things without shame or fear. What are your particular quirks?
In writing this blog, I am calling, encouraging and motivating other mums like me to dare to discover that you can e your real authentic self now, today. It ties in with a motto I am learning to live by and fight for Better me = Better Us. I hope with each post you read, you note this as a thread and message that weaves throughout this site, and that it motivates you to fight to be and love you.
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